Michal Leibowitz: But ultimately, we did what I think a lot of people in the past must have done: We put aside our doubts and tried to trust that we were not the first to have these worries and that, most probably, we would be able to handle the struggles as they came.

I rarely thought of growing up with this norm as a privilege or a stroke of luck. But now I wonder if it was.

Because increasingly, outside subcultures like mine, having a child in America is becoming a life-cycle stage you have to opt in to, rather than the default you must opt out of. Child rearing is something you consider doing when you have extensive savings and a good career and a perfect partner and are at peace with yourself and your choices and are sure that you can guarantee your kid a life of success and happiness. Except, of course, you can never guarantee that for your child, just as your parents — much as they wanted to — could not guarantee it for you.

Can a Government Be Pacifist? It is not correct, then, to frame debates about pacifism as if they came down to those who would commit to take up civic responsibility and those who refuse. Instead, the proper question becomes: What does Christian responsibility require? Whatever its allure, violence cannot ultimately guarantee that the world will be safe. And yet history shows that a conscientious decision to avoid violence may also have tragic knock-on effects. A Quaker commonwealth is not exempt from this reality. Still, Christians in Pennsylvania found unusual ways to live out their faith publicly, with an integrity that continues to underwrite the best of America’s tradition of political liberalism.

Protecting Life Means Protecting Death: To protect the lives of the most marginalized and powerless, the law must protect their deaths, too. Abuse victims who are terminally ill or disabled must be protected from any pressures by their partners to choose a hastened death rather than continued care. Those who are poor or otherwise marginalized need more support to receive medical care that could improve their quality of lives rather than the efficiency offered by self-imposed death.

[….]

Love, too, is miraculous. The more my mother’s body shut down and the pain medication gave her relief, the more the suffering was ours. We gladly bore it for this woman we loved and who loved us.

Finished reading: The Big Relief by David Zahl 📚

IS THIS THE WORST-EVER ERA OF AMERICAN POP CULTURE?: “The culture we have is so obsessed with ourselves, with people’s identities and personalities,” he said. “Perhaps we’ll be able to transcend that somehow. Perhaps we will get over this deeply individualistic, deeply self-obsessed moment.” He paused. “But I don’t know how that would happen.”

Currently listening: Jesus by Jon Guerra 🎶🎸

Currently reading: Let Your Life Speak by Parker J. Palmer 📚

Finished reading: Here by Lydia Sohn 📚

Second Adam (2005-2009) by Bruce Herman (b. 1953)

No escape: I think the general point here, beyond the specific question of how to get writing done, is that we desperately want to be saved. We want to find some person, or some philosophy of life, that will spare us the fear or discomfort or self-doubt or tedium that so often seems to come along for the ride, whenever we try to make progress on things we care about. We hate feeling yoked to reality in such an unpleasant way; we long instead to soar above it, in a realm free from problems. And it’s the mark of a bad self-help book, a dodgy spiritual guru or an incompetent therapist that they’ll be only too happy to encourage the illusion that this might one day be possible.

Spring Ice (1915-16) by Tom Thomson (1877-1917)

Currently reading: Perfection by Vincenzo Latronico 📚

Finished reading: Orbital by Samantha Harvey 📚

Finished reading: Faith, Hope and Carnage by Nick Cave 📚

Finished reading: Somehow by Anne Lamott 📚

Finished reading: Martyr! by Kaveh Akbar 📚

Finished reading: Moonbound by Robin Sloan 📚

🦉Owls in Towels

How I Learned That the Problem in My Marriage Was Me: “You’re very cute, and I’m sort of jealous of you and how unprotected you are,” I say, my eyes closed. “I can’t imagine being that open to being hurt. But I want to be that open to being loved.”

Meditations for Phone Addicts

Christ’s Entry Into Brussels in 1889 (1888) by James Ensor (1860-1949)

Mary Harrington: We are confusing contracts with covenants, and what that means for our relationships … a plausible place to start remedying this, for individual young adults, is not dating more but getting in more practice at showing up for others … Probably the means of showing up that’s both lowest-pressure and also most conducive to greater relatedness is going to church. I think there’s often a fear of being buttonholed and given the hard sell on God, but in my experience this doesn’t really happen; it’s more that if you show up enough times people will say hello and give you a biscuit and cup of tea after.